Deep Thoughts (fwd)
Jonathon Epstein (epstein@wfu.edu)
Tue, 12 Mar 1996 13:48:15 -0500
> Probably the earliest fly swatters were nothing more than some
>sort of striking surface attached to the end of a long stick.
>
> I wish I would have a real tragic love affair and get so
>bummed out that I'd just quit my job and become a bum for a few years,
>because I was thinking about doing that anyway.
>
> I think a good gift for the President would be a chocolate
>revolver. And since he's so busy, you'd probably have to run up to him
>real quick and hand it to him.
>
> Maybe in order to understand mankind we have to look at that
>word itself. MANKIND. Basically, it's made up of two separate words
>"mank" and "ind." What do these words mean? It's a mystery and that's
>why so is mankind.
>
> If you go flying back through time and you see somebody else
>flying forward into the future, it's probably best to avoid eye
>contact.
>
> It's easy to sit there and say you'd like to have more money.
>And I guess that's what I like about it. It's easy. Just sitting
>there, rocking back and forth, wanting that money.
>
> If you ever reach total enlightenment while you're drinking a
>beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose.
>
> To me, clowns aren't funny. In fact, they're kinda scary. I've
>wondered where this started and I think it goes back to the time I
>went to the circus and a clown killed my dad.
>
> As the light changed from red to green to yellow and back to
>red again, I sat there thinking about life. Was it nothing more than a
>bunch of honking and yelling? Sometimes it seemed that way.
>
> I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without
>hate. And I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never
>expect it.
>
> I hope some animal never bores a hole in my head and lays its
>eggs in my brain, because later you might think you're having a good
>idea but it's just eggs hatching.
>
> Whenever you read a good book, it's like the author is right
>there, in the room talking to you, which is why I don't like to read
>good books.
>
> What is it about a beautiful sunny afternoon, with the birds
>singing and the wind rustling through the leaves, that makes you want
>to get drunk? And after you're real drunk, maybe go down to the public
>park and stagger around and ask people for money, and then lay down
>and go to sleep.
>
> Instead of a trap door, what about a trap window? The guy
>looks out it, and if he leans too far, he falls out. Wait. I guess
>that's like a regular window.
>
> During the Middle Ages, probably one of the biggest mistakes
>was not putting on your armor because you were "just going down to the
>corner."
>
> If I ever get real rich, I hope I'm not real mean to poor
>people, like I am now.
>
> When I found the skull in the woods, the first thing I did was
>call the police. But then I got curious about it. I picked it up, and
>started wondering who this person was, and why he had deer horns.
>
> I remember how my great-uncle Jerry would sit on the porch and
>whittle all day long. Once he whittled me a toy boat out of a larger
>toy boat I had. It was almost as good as the first one, except now it
>had bumpy whittle marks all over it. And no paint, because he had
>whittled off the paint.
>
> Here's a good thing to do if you go to a party and you don't
>know anybody: First take out the garbage. Then go around and collect
>any extra garbage that people might have, like a crumpled napkin, and
>take that out too. Pretty soon people will want to meet the busy
>garbage guy.
>
>
>Later Daze
>
>
Jonathon S. Epstein "You can't elect
Department of Sociolgy a dream revolution
Wake Forest University when you've a bullet
Winston Salem, NC 27109 in the back of
epstein@wfu.edu your mind."
Fish